There is a comical story surrounding the scattering of her ashes, or in this case I'd have to call it the dumping over of them. Her best friends oldest daughter was the first person who took the ashes out of the bag and walked towards the surf. She made the mistake of turning her back on the waves and when she did a large wave come upon her, knocking her over. When she got back up, covered in that cold sea water, the bag of ashes fell over. Now, like I said, I know my mom.. she totally had a hand in that.. she was never one to be completely solemn in any situation and she most likely was impatient to be out of that bag at that point. Poor Melissa was the one who had to pay the price, being drenched in the process, but the end result was that she was free. My mom most likely knew that if I had to touch her ashes and dispense of them I would be an emotional mess. This way it was quick and easy and she was out of that confine.
It took me about 2 seconds to get over my initial sadness at how that happened. After that I just had to laugh. What else can you do at that point? She was laughing, I know. One thing about my mom was she really did have a wicked sense of humor and she may have felt badly for poor Melissa but would've laughed all the same. What happened really broke up the tension of the day and helped me feel as if my mom was truly there with us on that day's journey. The weather was chilly and the air was filled with mist but it was a beautiful day and going over to the coast and doing this for my mom was the only way I thought would be fitting to end the year.
After this episode was over with I kept walking down to the spot where her ashes fell out of the bag and talking to her. I told her how much we missed her but understand she is better off now and how we all love her. I asked her if she was now happy.. obviously I didn't expect an answer but I felt as if she was telling me one with the calmness and peace that I felt there.
The mist in the air had an adverse effect on my camera, making taking pictures there difficult. I managed to get this one of her urn sitting on the sand before her ashes were taken out of it.
I feel completely drawn to that beach where she was placed and cannot wait to get back there again. Luckily before we had the ashes mishap we took some of them out of the bag and set them aside to be sent down to her friends that live in Mexico. I will have the remaining bit of her until sometime next month when they'll be transported down there by a friend that lives here who'll be visiting down there. She is back on my fireplace mantle, next to the ashes of my sweet Gizmo. I think sending her ashes along their way will be difficult but I know I will still feel her. I always do and won't let myself forget just how good that feels.
I hope you're happy, Mom. Love you very, very much.
1 comment:
Renee this was such a nice blog on your Mother it did come the heart and she loved you for that, as I have always told your mom that you and Nicki are not only cousins but have the same tender heart you must have got that from Grandpa, can hear you mother now saying that's for sure. As you Uncle I am so proud of you the way you handled everything to do with you mom. We all loved your mom didn't see eye to eye all the time we loved her very much and just knowing that she is in heaven with her Mom and Dad all is going to be OK. Nick was a very important of her life and just knowing that she is looking over him and watching out for him also will make you feel better. take care and will talk to you later
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