Something I just wanted to share..

Recently I came upon a quote that really resonated with me and I felt the urge to write about how much it affected me here. As far as I am concerned, truer words have rarely been spoken.

"Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is forever to decide to have your heart go walking outside your body"

A very simple passage but one that really stuck with me. Beautiful words to describe a parents love for the child they helped create. Since I only have the mother's perspective to go with here, I can only speak as the person who grew a child in my body. I know a fathers love for his child is strong, no doubt about that, but there is something that seems magical and powerful about a mother's love for her baby. Since I lost my mom I have given alot of thought about maternal love and how it's affected me as a grown woman and the role it has played in how I express love for my boy. Stating the obvious here I will have to say that there is just nothing more gripping and life-changing than that kind of love. Other types of love fade but that one just seems to strengthen over time. Struggles with how difficult parenting can be are forgotten when you look at your child and know how it's all worth it. All of this is just from my point of view, of course, but I am sure these feelings are universal in nature.

Love, in any form but parental love, is something that is hard to explain. Either you feel it or you don't. The love a parent has for their child is the most profound form of it but that's not to say that those who have never reproduced are incapable of feeling something just as strong. Speaking as someone who loved a pet profoundly, I can say that kind of love is in the same ballpark as the one I have for my son. The main difference is this - I have been able to live my life and go on without my dog; I don't think the same could be said if I was without my son. Gizmo touched my heart but Nick owns it. He owns it because he IS my heart - it's as simple as that.

I've always been a big fan of letting pictures tell the story so here are a couple of pictures of what I think love looks like.

The below pic is one of all time favorites. This picture never fails to warm me and make me smile.




This picture was taken last summer at my mom's house. The look on her face as she looks at him is so sweet. His smile as he basks in that attention is just as wonderful. I love this picture and am so very glad I have it.

Another school year is done..

Nick started his long summer break as of Friday, June 26th. So far, so good.. but I may want to wait a few weeks before really saying that as that could change. He loves the routine and structure of school but has been enjoying sleeping in since the school year has ended. His in-home therapy hours were doubled from their usual twelve hours a week to continue to work on the skills he's lacking and to keep the ones he's mastered fresh. He has a great young guy who has been working with him for a couple of months now and that tutor has been able to be pick up the extra shifts that Nick has been granted. I am happy about that because having another tutor come in to work with him would require a few sessions of rapport building just to get aquainted and that could take away from Nick getting the extra help he needs. This guy has a way of making it fun for my boy and that is always a plus in getting Nick to do anything, believe me.

His teacher sent home some pictures taken of Nick during the school year. Here are some of my favorites:

Cookie decorating day during the week of Halloween



This picture shows Nick with his favorite of the aides in his class, Miss Sherri. Nick LOVES her and I happen to agree with him.. she's very sweet and the smile he gets on his face even when her name is mentioned is too precious. I think my boy may have a little crush on her.. too cute!



The below pic was taken of Nick on his class field trip to the pumpkin patch last October. This was the day that he made his mama's heart nearly stop from fright when he took off and was nowhere to be found for nearly ten minutes.. I am quite used to him making my heart skip a beat or two but this was entirely different!




At the end of the school year his teacher also sent home two books of art projects that Nick had been working on all school year. They targeted both numbers and letters and I took some pictures of the ones I really thought were particularly wonderful.














As you may be able to tell, I am a very proud mama. My boy has been through so much this past year and while he is still coping with the absense of someone who was an integral part of his young life, he's doing so much better now than he was a few months ago. I honestly don't think I could love that boy any more than I already do. He has made my world a better place and continues to bring me the joy that I need to combat the sadness that still plagues me often. What a guy he is!